Wednesday, 29 April 2009

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  Sounding Off with manilajo n e s

  There is a school of thought that says that a woman’s level of intelligence is inversely proportional to how good-looking she is.  This may or may not be true.  I don’t really know if most hot women are stupid or if most ugly women are brilliant.  I know quite a few intelligent women who are not ugly at all, and I know a fair number of dumb broads who look like they belong in the WNBA.  It’s really not my concern whether or not that school of thought is true.  I’ll leave that for the historians to decide.  What is my concern, however, is whether that thought applies to men.  A few days ago I saw something on the TV that I haven’t seen in at least eight years.  I saw rock music wizard Matt Pinfield, and I was taken aback because (1) I hadn’t seen him since he hosted Farmclub.com on the USA network back in 2000, and (2) I had totally forgotten what a weird-looking dude he was.  But, I was delighted to see him back on TV because he was my favorite VJ on MTV in the late 1990s.  His rock/pop music knowledge is unmatched (as evident from the Stump Matt show), and he seemed to be the only VJ on MTV who was genuinely interested in music.  Carson Daly and Ananda Lewis were his coworkers at MTV at the time, and while they were both fairly attractive people, their knowledge for music was minuscule compared to Pinfield’s.  If looks are inversely proportional to intelligence (in music, anyway), Matt Pinfield’s musical intelligence must be astronomical considering that he looks like a cross between Dr. Evil and a Muppet.

  His new show, called Sound Off with Matt Pinfield, is an interview show in which he interviews artists in a series of interviews (yeah!).  I caught the episode with KT Tunstall, who was promoting her album Drastic Fantastic.  Like all true rock heads, Pinfield dove into the interview by commenting on the album’s heavy guitar sound and Tunstall’s phenomenal guitar skills.  And while it seemed as if Pinfield wanted to talk about guitars all day long, KT did manage get a word or two in about her songwriting.  The most peculiar thing that Tunstall explained to Ol' Cueball was that while her lyrics can be considered poetic, she doesn’t consider herself to be a poet.  She stressed that song lyrics aren’t simply poems that are sung to a tune, and that poems aren’t simply song lyrics without a song.  She admitted that she wasn’t artistic enough to be a poet.  This struck me as being intensely humble as I consider KT to be artistic in every sense of the word.  But, I suppose she was right.  The things that we do are only defined by their context.  Although the lyrics that she writes follow a particular meter and rhyme, they are certainly not poems.  And although the words that I write on my blog occasionally form a coherent thought, my blog doesn’t necessarily make me a “writer.”  However, it seems that there exists a disconnect within the blogging community between what exactly is a blogger versus a “writer.”

  There is a growing sentiment that there is “nothing good to read” in the Xanga community.  This is a sentiment that I don’t quite understand.  I’ve seen a number of bloggers complain about the content on Xanga, and after reading some of their blogs, I get the feeling that, generally, they perceive themselves to be progressive postmodern intellectuals who think they’re keeping their readers on the edge of their seats in anticipation of their next post.  To some extent, they all seem to be irked at the lack of intellectually stimulating content on Xanga.  Their overall attitude is a bit pretentious, as it implies that their content is worth reading. 

  Complaining about the content on Xanga is the type of behavior that completely baffles me.  It’s akin to walking into a McDonald’s restaurant and openly complaining that there’s nothing good to eat.  Anyone who walks into a McDonald’s knows what’s on the menu and, thus, knows what to expect.  So, anyone who consciously goes to McDonalds for lunch and consciously complains about the menu is a complete bozo.  Most people know that they’re not going to get a rib-eye steak extra-value meal when they go to Mickey D’s.  For a premium cut of prime rib, even a moron would know to go to Lawry’s rather than McDonald’s.  In the same sense, anyone who consciously peruses a blog community should know what to expect.  They’re not going to find Ernest Hemingway, Charles Dickinson, or Mark Twain.   Hell, they’re not even going to find Chad Kultgen!  They’re going to find people who write because they hate their cubicle job.  So, it befuddles me that bloggers complain about not finding good literature in the blogsphere.  Much like McDonald’s patrons know that they’re not exactly food connoisseurs, bloggers should be aware that they are at the bottom of the literary totem pole.  Bloggers might think that they’re literary geniuses, but, at the end of the day, they’re still bloggers.  Even if a blogger is a “writer” in real life, they’re still simply a blogger on the internet.  Even if a blogger considers him or herself to be a “grown-up”, touting their content as “worth featuring” is equivalent to calling the Quarter Pounder with Cheese the “dinner of the week.”  And here’s a more ominous perspective:  Paulo Coelho is widely considered to be the most popular contemporary writer, but the most popular contemporary blogger is Perez Hilton.  You are the company that you keep.

  As a blogger, I am well aware of the limits of my blogging existence.  Much like KT Tunstall is not a poet simply because her words rhyme, a hardcore blogger is not an “intellectual” simply because he or she wrote a 2000 word post.  Anyone who goes to Xanga looking for existential enlightenment is always going to be disappointed.  Although there are plenty of blogs that I do not like to read and there are plenty of bloggers who I think are complete buffoons, I will never complain about not having enough “good content” on Xanga because it’s simply not true.  If you’re really looking for literary masterpieces or something intellectually stimulating, go to the local Barnes & Noble or public library and I’ll guarantee you’ll find what you’re looking for.  (And, if you’re at the library and it’s closing time, they’ll let you take home whatever book you want FOR FREE.)  But if you’re going to insist on whining about "good content," then go to LiveJournal or Blogger and let them hear you bitch about what you feel you’re entitled to read.

  As for me, I’ll sound off on my blog and take Xanga for the GODDAMN win.

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